Tag: living dead
“They’re coming to get you, Barbra…”
-Night of the Living Dead (1968)
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Otto; or, Up with Dead People (2008)
Once upon a time, I started a movie blog. The twist of the story is that what I created was not this Chwineka Watches, but a different, earlier blog whose name escapes me at the moment (probably also Chwineka Watches). The reviews were more longform, with posts being around 4000 words and featured several screenshots that had quirky captions because I was obviously inspired by Cracked Dot Com. One of the movies I reviewed at the time was Otto; or, Up with Dead People, a film about a gay zombie, something I’m redoing here as part of Pride Month. Looking…
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Army of the Dead (2021)
I want to open this post by saying that this is probably my favorite Zack Snyder movie. I know I said that about Sucker Punch, and I still need to revisit 300 and Watchmen to see how I feel about them, but yeah, this is my new favorite of his. Army of the Dead is a zombie film apparently unrelated to Snyder’s Dawn of the Dead remake, but it’s a fun zombie heist flick to turn your brain off while watching. Unfortunately, my brain is stuck in the “on” position, so there are some things I want to talk about.
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The Rift: Dark Side of the Moon (2016)
Lemme pull back the curtain a bit here at Chwineka Watches: I usually listen to music when writing up these posts. Revolutionary, I know. I have that “lofi hip hop radio” YouTube video bookmarked, but lately I’ve felt the urge to listen to music in my collection. Even more recently, I’ve taken all the songs I have from my new favorite band–the Anix–put them into one playlist, and just hit shuffle when it comes time to write. I really do like these guys, so imagine my surprise when I heard them while watching this utterly lackluster Serbian film! But, like,…
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Tsunambee (2015)
Who doesn’t love a good bad disaster movie? You don’t go into Sharknado expecting fine cinema, you go in hoping that a guy cuts a shark in half with a chainsaw, and that said shark was delivered to him via tornado. So imagine how excited I was when I first saw a film called Tsunambee. The tagline on the poster is “This is gonna sting a little!” It’s a goofy movie about a tsunami of bees, right? Right…?
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Plan 9 From Outer Space (1959)
Let’s finish off a month of the worst movies ever with a classic. I gotta say, after falling in love with B-movie parodies like The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra, I had to keep reminding myself that Plan 9 from Outer Space was absolutely sincere. I mean, assuming the film Ed Wood is to be believed, but that’s a key ingredient in making a cult classic. Sincerity in ineptitude is what separates the men from the boys, and Birdemic: Shock and Terror from something like Taintlight.
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ThanksKilling 3 (2012)
Have you ever watched something so bad and/or dumb that you can actually feel your brain cells killing themselves so they don’t have to retain anything from it? A movie so awful you walk away a dumber person? WELL ON THAT NOTE, let me try to talk about ThanksKilling 3 without screaming too much!
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The Mummy (2017)
By my counting, Mummy Mondays should’ve ended on June 1st. This is assuming that coronavirus didn’t upend just about everything, Movie Night was still meeting regularly, and that we wouldn’t’ve missed a week. But coronavirus did happen and it took me months before I decided to finish up this series by myself. It’s been a weird trip full of bad sequels and rare good moments, but with Mr. Tom Cruise’s 2017 The Mummy, we can finally put this monster back in its tomb.
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The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)
Did you know that there was a third Mummy film starring Mr. Brendan Fraser? I’m pretty sure I didn’t before starting Mummy Mondays. Released 7 years after The Mummy Returns and not directed by Stephen Sommers–the director of the first two films–this really does feel like an unnecessary addition just so it can be called a trilogy. Which is a bit of a shame because despite this film getting negative reviews, I didn’t think it was that bad.
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Dead & Breakfast (2004)
Is this really the first zombie movie I’ve reviewed here? Huh. Makes sense, as it’s not my favorite horror subgenre and I don’t own many zombie movies, but it’s still a bit surprising. But Dead & Breakfast is not just a zombie movie, though! It’s a horror comedy about an undead spirit possessing the inhabitants of a tiny town, trying to murder everyone they come across and adding the bodies to its growing army. There’s also a zombie line dancing sequence. But let’s start at the beginning.
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The Lost Skeleton Returns Again (2009)
We’re back! Almost a decade after The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra, just about everybody returns for The Lost Skeleton Returns Again. And I do mean (just about) everybody: the titular Lost Skeleton survived being thrown off a cliff but is missing his body; the dead evil scientist, Roger Fleming, is replaced by his twin brother, Peter Fleming, who is not evil; and Ranger Brad’s twin brother, Jungle Brad, steps in. They have different last names, of course.
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