You know it's been a hell of a week when Movie Night is just dedicated to actors who have recently died. Case in point, Mr. David Warner passed away at the age of 80, just shy of his 81st birthday (which is today, by the way). There were so many things we could've watched to remember him--one friend suggested Tron, I had In the Mouth of Madness queued up, and there was the possibility of just watching several episodes of Batman: The Animated Series that featured Ra's al Ghul. But in the end it turned out that most of us hadn't seen Time Bandits, so we went with that. And it was goofy fun!
mind control
“Get out of my head, Charles!”
-X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
I just can't talk about this movie without going full spoilers. There's a lot to cover, so this will be on the longer side.
Black Widow (2021)
I've been going back and forth on whether to just go full spoilers when talking about Black Widow, the first Marvel Cinematic Universe movie in two years. When I covered all the other movies earlier this year as part of MCU March, the assumption was that people had already seen those films so I gave a summary as a refresher then talked about all the plot points I wanted to talk about. But Black Widow comes out at a weird time, where on one hand people are cheering that COVID is finally over, while on the other the Delta variant is becoming more widespread. Not a lot of people are willing to spend two hours in an enclosed space with strangers and Disney+ is charging $30 to be able to watch the film in your house. In the end I went with very light spoilers because I'm betting a lot of people are waiting to see this, which is a shame since it was good.
Bit (2019)
How do you define an "X movie" where X is whatever trait you're talking about? Is something a gay movie only because it features at least one gay person? Is it still "gay" if they're not the main characters? And is it still "gay" if one of the main actors is gay, but it never comes up so we're not sure if their character also is? I know it sounds like I'm talking around the Beauty and the Beast live-action remake, but that's a chore for some other time. After all, it's still Pride Month, so we're talking about overtly queer movies! Bit is queer, to be sure, largely because the main cast are lady vampires who are into other ladies, but that's not the only reason...
The Mummy’s Kiss: 2nd Dynasty (2006)
If I say that this was a highly requested movie, would you believe me? It's an obvious lie, of course, but it sounds better than admitting I wanted to watch this. Long story short, back in April of 2020 when we didn't realize how long the quarantine was going to be, Mummy Mondays was put on indefinite hold along with my friends' Movie Night. I watched several movies with mummies in the Mondays that followed, and one of them was The Mummy's Kiss, a lesbian porn with mummies and a flimsy plot. Well, there was a sequel made, so that's where we are now. Yup, this is definitely something people wanted to see and not my grim curiosity in action!
The Avengers (2012)
Everything has been leading to this. Six main characters introduced over 5 movies, all threads leading to the creation of the Avengers. But it's not as simple as them just deciding working together is a great idea. What do you think this is, 1963? So let's talk about the last film in Marvel's Phase One as MCU March continues!
ThanksKilling 3 (2012)
Have you ever watched something so bad and/or dumb that you can actually feel your brain cells killing themselves so they don't have to retain anything from it? A movie so awful you walk away a dumber person? WELL ON THAT NOTE, let me try to talk about ThanksKilling 3 without screaming too much!
Children of the Corn: The Gathering (1996)
Welcome back to October of the Corn! Today we're talking about Children of the Corn: The Gathering (the "IV" on the poster and generally accepted title doesn't appear in the movie), the most forgettable one in the entire franchise. Pretty impressive, right? Fields of Terror has the kid who looks like an Oriental shorthair cat; Isaac's Return has the return of Isaac (naturally); Revelation has the weird hotel; Genesis is the one in California without any corn; and the reboot and Runaway are dumb but have at least one or two things about them that I remember. I mean, fuck, this is the one that has the sex offender from Glee and even that didn't leave any sort of lasting impact on my brain! Don't worry, I'm not spending any more time on him.
Children of the Corn III: Urban Harvest (1995)
I don't know why I picked up every single Children of the Corn movie. It started years ago when I did Chwineka Watches 31 Netflix Horror Movies for October and all the Corn movies up to that point (minus Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice for some reason) were available for streaming. Then years later I decided to inflict it all on Movie Night, which... well it didn't require me to pick up physical copies, but it helped facilitate watching. And now here I am, watching the whole series for a third time. Which is a long winded way of saying that having seen all the movies, Children of the Corn III: Urban Harvest is the best sequel (although that doesn't mean it's good).
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power – Season 5, Episodes 1-13
It’s been a wild ride, but here we are at last, at the final season of She-Ra. What started as a heroic fantasy tale has now turned into a sci-fi epic, which doesn’t at all resemble the story idea I’ve had in my head since middle school and I’m totally not at all annoyed that someone with more talent got to write it before I did, nope! Anyway, the gang gets gayer and fights God!
Chwineka Watches 