COVID fucked up a lot of stuff. Case in point, Marvel celebrated the release of Thor: Love and Thunder because that meant they had finally caught up with all the projects announced at San Diego Comic Con 2019 (that had a release date). November 5, 2021? Whoopsie! But it's here now, and it's getting... very mixed reviews. And I kind of agree. To an extent, at least.
So you might notice that I have not ascended to godhood. While I did correctly guess that What If...?'s eighth episode would be titled "What If Ultron Won?" I was wrong about the title of the final episode. It's actually titled "What If the Watcher Broke His Oath?" which is definitely a better title, so I'll take that loss. Everything in the first season has been leading up to this moment, as well as something in the second season! Let's wrap this up!
A lot of What If...? comic stories are total downers. A bunch of real bummer buzzkills, bro! But why can't everything just be chill for once? Sometimes it's just nice to have an alternate reality that doesn't harsh my vibe. I'm running out of incredibly dated slang, but the gist is that "What If Thor Was an Only Child?" is essentially a frat bro comedy about Earth's biggest party ever, and the party poopers who are ready to nuke the site from orbit.
In the comics, What If? stories don't typically have happy endings. Sure, there are exceptions like "What If the Thing Had Continued to Mutate?" (What If? #37, 1983) where Ben Grimm ends the story back in his human body and his girlfriend regained her ability to see. But in that same issue, "What If the Beast Had Truly Become a Beast?" sees Hank McCoy get dropped off in the Savage Land--a jungle filled with dinosaurs--because he had lost all of his intelligence and humanity. The first two episodes of What If...? definitely had their sad moments, but things generally worked out better than in the MCU. Peggy Carter had the training to better foil Hydra, and T'Challa had the charisma to change the universe. But then we have this episode, "What If the World Lost Its Mightiest Heroes?" which is a murder mystery. The victims? Just about every Avenger. Better grab a flashlight, 'cause it's about to get real dark!
I've talked about this before, but The Asylum is a film company known for ridiculous movies like Sharknado and a ridiculous amount of knock-offs. Mockbusters, if you will. Back in 2005, Blockbuster--remember when that was relevant?--accidentally ordered 100,000 copies of HG Wells' War of the Worlds instead of the Stephen Spielberg film that came out the same year, War of the Worlds. From there the company just went wild, creating knockoffs like Atlantic Rim, Sunday School Musical, and in this particular case, Almight Thor to go up against Marvel's Thor. The God of Thunder is technically in the public domain, so why not!
As I said on Friday, I wanted to watch the original, theatrical version of Justice League before I dove into Mr. Zack Snyder's Justice League so I could better compare and contrast. I made some predictions of what I thought would get cut--I was pretty much absolutely right--and what the new film would look like. Now, having watched it I can definitely say that this is the most Zack Snyder movie Zack Snyder has ever made, and that it is better than the theatrical version. The rest? Well...
I did it! MCU March is officially over and I successfully talked about all 23 Marvel Cinematic Universe movies over the course of a month. I don't know about you guys, but I am superhero-ed out. Now it's time to sit back and watch a bunch of movies that I've been... Wait, what's that? Zack Snyder's Justice League came out last month? Zack Snyder's Justice League IS REAL?! For fuck's sake, this was just supposed to be a marketing stunt! It was never actually going to happen! Uuuuuuugh... Fine. FINE! In order to give the illusion of being topical, I'll review the four hour monstrosity. But because I'm me and my brain is horribly flawed, I've got to review the original Justice League movie first so I have something to compare to. But that's it, after this no more superhero movies for the rest of April!
Everything in the Marvel Cinematic Universe has led to this. The Avengers and their allies stood up to Thanos in Avengers: Infinity War and were found wanting. Now it's up to the survivors to pick up the pieces and try to, well... avenge. This is the end of an era, except, you know, for Spider-Man: Far From Home being an epilogue to Phase Three and all that. MCU March is almost over, so let's get straight to it!
I think I can safely say that this is the biggest cinematic crossover ever. What even comes close? The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen? The Monster Squad? Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Okay, that last one is a strong contender, but I digress. After 10 years of setting up characters and stories in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, it all comes together with Avengers: Infinity War. We're in the endgame of MCU March, so heads up: a LOT happens so the review section is going to be a bit long.
I'm kicking off this entry in MCU March with an addendum. In the Ant-Man post, I said that movie was my favorite of the "overtly comedic Marvel movies." Clearly I had forgotten about Thor: Ragnarok and how great this movie is when I wrote that. I think it's safe to say that this is my favorite Marvel Cinematic Universe film (and I double checked the list so I won't have to make this addendum again). I guess after rewatching all these movies, I have a soft spot for the God of Thunder.