Category: 2011
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Paranormal Activity 3 (2011)
So… Paranormal Activity 3 is the one of the better horror “threequels,” right? I mean, honestly, what else is in the running? Ignoring obvious losers like Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth and Children of the Corn III: Urban Harvest we have a couple worth mentioning in this intro paragraph: The Exorcist III is pretty decent (but we’ll get to that later in Paranormal Octoberty), I’m not sure if Day of the Dead counts because it doesn’t have a “3” in the title but it was also pretty good, Friday the 13th Part III is only really noteworthy because that’s when…
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Hostel: Part III (2011)
The Hostel series may only be three movies (as of writing), but it too entered that stage franchises tend to fall into where the original creator leaves and has nothing to do with later movies. Mr. Eli Roth chose not to work on Hostel: Part III, but didn’t stop production or anything. Instead it’s a film that has elements of Hostel, but enough differences that the whole thing feels… off. Also it now takes place in Las Vegas, because sure, why not. Welcome back to Saw-mhain!
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The Backwater Gospel (2011)
Now, it’s completionally understandable that someone would look at a lack of a When They Cry: Kai episode summary over the weekend and the review of a short film on Monday–that went up late, damn it, because I didn’t notice the upload time was set to 11PM and had to change that–would suggest that I’ve fallen behind on the blog. But that’s absolutely… well, it’s not incorrect, let’s just say that. But The Backwater Gospel has always been something I wanted to cover, because while it’s less than 10 minutes long, the look, feel, and story are top notch.
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Hellraiser: Revelations (2011)
Film rights are a can of worms. They are the reason the Marvel Cinematic Universe was created without mutants, despite the Avengers and X-Men both being owned by Marvel. It’s also partially why Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch are no longer Magneto’s children (as of time of writing, the Trial of Magneto may have a weird ending). Whenever you hear about film rights, it’s typically never a good sign. That’s the case with Hellraiser: Revelations, a rushed entry in the Hellraiser franchise made so Dimension could keep the film rights. The Hellbound Halloween has hit its lowest point. This is…
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Beethoven’s Christmas Adventure (2011)
I think this little game has gone on long enough, don’t you? Since I started reviewing all the Beethoven movies, I’ve been playing coy with how many films are actually in the franchise. For those keeping track this is the 7th film so far, and I’m happy to announce that this is the penultimate one. Yup, Beethoven’s Treasure Tail is the 8th and final movie–as of time of writing–so we’re so close to being done! I’m almost free from this self-imposed prison of having to rewatch these films! We just have to get through the one that decided it was…
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Swamp Shark (2011)
My celebration of Shark Week continues, now officially one month late as of today! I’m continuing on partly because this was all planned ahead of time and partially out of spite. Going by the listing on the back of the “Shark Bait: 6 Killer shark Films” DVD case I’ve been pulling movies from, today would be Santa Jaws, but I’m saving that one for Christmas. The gay kid from Joe Bell manifesting a Santa hat wearing nightmare shark? Sounds hilarious! But that means today I’m stuck watching Swamp Shark. It’s not the worst shark movie I’ve seen, but it’s far…
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My Life Me
Today’s post was supposed to be about literally any other show. Now that I’ve finished the first season of Higurashi no Naku Koro ni, AKA When They Cry, the sky was the limit! Do I jump back into superhero shows with the first season of Arrow? Start on something I love like Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated? Or pull out something weird from my DVD collection like Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century? But no, while looking up… I honestly don’t remember what, I discovered the existence of the Canadian cartoon My Life Me, and I haven’t been able to get it…
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Almighty Thor (2011)
I’ve talked about this before, but The Asylum is a film company known for ridiculous movies like Sharknado and a ridiculous amount of knock-offs. Mockbusters, if you will. Back in 2005, Blockbuster–remember when that was relevant?–accidentally ordered 100,000 copies of HG Wells’ War of the Worlds instead of the Stephen Spielberg film that came out the same year, War of the Worlds. From there the company just went wild, creating knockoffs like Atlantic Rim, Sunday School Musical, and in this particular case, Almight Thor to go up against Marvel’s Thor. The God of Thunder is technically in the public domain,…
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Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)
With Captain America: The First Avenger, all 6 of the main Avengers have been introduced. Iron Man was introduced in Iron Man, Hulk in The Incredible Hulk, Black Widow in Iron Man 2, and both Thor and Hawkeye in Thor. All that’s missing is the star-spangled man with a plan, leading us to this flashback movie. Welcome back to MCU March! Let’s talk about the last movie leading up to The Avengers.
Chwineka Watches 