Merry Christmas! My gift to you is me rambling about aspect ratios. No, you can't exchange it for something else. So anyway, you've probably heard of "widescreen" versus "full screen." Full screen is an aspect ratio of 4:3 (if the width is 4 units, then the height is 3 units), creating close to a square. This was the format of most early television shows and a lot of movies got cut down to that for a home release, either losing things on the sides or forcing editors to make awkward shifts to keep the action on the smaller screen. Case in point, the DVD of The Muppet Christmas Carol I have gives you the option of watching either widescreen or full screen before starting the movie, and in the full screen example you can see Peter Cratchit nearly cut out of the shot entirely. So widescreen for theatrical movies is generally better, right? Well, let me tell you why I prefer to watch this particular movie in full screen, or at least for one particular scene...
I want to start by saying that we have a lot to thank Robert Zemeckis for. He wrote and directed Back to the Future, its sequels, and directed the... Back to the Future Saturday morning cartoon? That has to be a typo. Anyway the man is a legend! Buuuuut... holy crap, his animated movies are unpleasant to look at. It also doesn't help that the story at the heart of The Polar Express is also pretty blah.
It’s been a wild ride, but here we are at last, at the final season of She-Ra. What started as a heroic fantasy tale has now turned into a sci-fi epic, which doesn’t at all resemble the story idea I’ve had in my head since middle school and I’m totally not at all annoyed that someone with more talent got to write it before I did, nope! Anyway, the gang gets gayer and fights God!
Gonna start this one with a bit of a tangent. The original rough draft of this post was 2563 words. See, previously I was devoting at least a paragraph to each episode, going over everything in detail. But that’s longer than your average high school essay (hell, upwards of double the length) and that’s just unfeasible. It absolutely makes sense to cut everything down, summarizing the season in a paragraph or two, and then going over things I liked or didn’t like. But on the other hand, I’m throwing away thousands of words I wrote, which is one hell of an edit. It’s all for the greater good, I know, but don’t be surprised if at some point in the future I post an actual essay about… something.
Season 2 of She-Ra walked so season 3 could run. Sure, not every episode needs to be plot heavy, but this is the point where things really start ramping up. And after watching these six episodes, we’re now halfway through the series! Woo!
Welcome back to me talking way too much about She-Ra and the Princesses of Power! Today I’m focusing on season 2, which will be a shorter post than yesterday’s. Season 2 is only seven episodes, while season 3 is six; together that adds up to 13, the same number of episodes as seasons 1, 4, and 5. Maybe there were production issues that delayed the second half of the season? The world may never know, because I couldn’t find any reason for it. Anyway, off we go!
Watching movies for a post every weekday while I’m stuck in this quarantine endless now (never a tomorrow) does help me keep track of what day it is, but it doesn’t really give me a lot of time to watch anything else. There are a lot of series I’ve fallen behind on while doing all this. So let’s review one of them! I spent 21+ hours watching all of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, so let’s talk about each season this week! I never said I’d only do movie reviews! And even if I did, I lied!
Did you know that there is an Air Bud cinematic universe? If you need a moment to process that, you’re probably not alone. Air Bud spawned Air Buddies, which in turned spawned Santa Buddies and its sequel. But that’s not all in the talking animal universe (the puppies talk, by the way)! Now firmly in the control of writer/director/producer Robert Vince, we also have Pup Stars (dogs singing), several monkey movies (MVP: Most Valuable Primate, Spymate, Monkey Up, etc.), and now Russell Madness.
I don’t know about you, but I need a break from Batman. So let’s switch gears and watching something absolutely awful! Foodfight!–the title has an exclamation point so you know it’s quality–is infamously bad: it’s hideous, the story sucks, it’s shameless product placement, and it cost $65 million to make because they had no idea what they were doing and then the computers the movie was stored on got stolen. Oops! It eventually limped its way to a DVD release, and here we are. I own this. I make only the best decisions.
I remember watching the Legends of the Hidden Temple TV show when I was a kid. If you don’t know what that is, that just reminds me that I’m an old on the internet. Anyway, it was a adventure game show on Nickelodeon back in the 1990’s where teams of kids would attempt challenges, and if successful they would enter the Hidden Temple and try to get an artifact out before the hidden guards would pop out, scare the shit out of them (and probably a good number of kids watching), and end their run. And because nothing is sacred, in 2016 it was brought back as a made for TV movie. Apparently the first game show to be turned into a movie! That’s certainly… something.