Prey of the Jaguar (1997)

I love discount DVDs. Two movies you've never heard of for a dollar? Sign me up! I don't even care that they're usually pretty awful. Are you really going to regret a movie where you only spent 50 cents? I mean, generally I'd say no, but I'm not the one in my friend group who … Continue reading Prey of the Jaguar (1997)

X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

So X-Men: The Last Stand was not very good. I know, the hottest of hot takes. So I'm sure the stakes while making X-Men Origins: Wolverine were high as a result. 20th Century Fox needed to this to be good, damn it! This could be the start of an entire X-Men Origins, or possibly lead to an X-Men 4! That's obviously not what happened, in part because this film was... Well, I'll hold off on my opinion 'til later for dramatic effect.

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

Once upon a time I thought this was the worst movie I had ever seen. Ah, to be that young again, ignorant of things like Diary of a Cannibal and Collateral Beauty… Regardless, this is widely considered to be a wet fart of an ending to an otherwise pretty decent trilogy. Some even still consider this the worst X-Men movie, but… well, touch on that more when I eventually review X-Men: Dark Phoenix.

X2 (2003)

Movie trilogies often follow a pattern: the first is fine, the second is superb, and the third is terrible. The X-Men trilogy is a wonderful example of this, in part because X2 (later retitled X2: X-Men United) is one of my favorite movies, and quite possibly my favorite superhero movie. This is the high point for the X-Men films; it’s all downhill from here! Well, except maybe for Logan and Deadpool, but still.

X-Men (2000)

No surprise to anyone who knows me, but I am a huge X-Men nerd. The first comic I really remember picking up was Uncanny X-Men #300, chosen after careful consideration at how the story–just kidding, it was a holographic cover and my dumb kid brain latched onto it. I was instantly hooked, absorbing just about every piece of X-Men media I could. There was the animated series, action figures, trading cards, card games, board games, and of course, enough comics that if they were to fall on me, I’d be crushed to death. As time went on I became a bit more discerning and stopped picking up every single Marvel comic that had an “X” in the title, but my love of the characters continued. So imagine my joy when my favorite heroes were going to appear on the silver screen! And the result was… fine. It’s fine by today’s standards. It’s fine.

Batman (1966)

Some of you had to know what was coming. Holy Throwback Thursday, Batman! It’s Adam West and Burt Ward in Batman ’66! After a yacht vanishes before their eyes and a shark explodes, Batman and Robin know that this is the work of (at least) one of their greatest enemies. The whole situation is fishy, so it’s the Penguin! It happened at sea, and “C” stands for Catwoman! The shark was “pulling” Batman’s leg, so the Joker! And it all this adds up to a sinister riddle… Riddle-r? The Riddler! If you haven’t seen this movie, I want you to know that every one of these amazing leaps in logic are straight from the movie and take place over a 10 second sequence. And they’re not the movie ridiculous part. This movie is amazing.

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

I want to do something different for The Dark Knight Rises, so let’s get the summary out of the way now: 8 years after The Dark Knight, Batman is retired, Catwoman is never called that in the movie, Bane wants to destroy Gotham, he breaks the Bat, Alfred pulls a “Giles leaves Buffy in season 6” and I still hate it, we see society turning on the rich as envisioned by the rich, surprise it was Talia all along, Batman dies, but not really, Bruce and Selina are happy, and Mr. Joseph Gordon-Levitt may become the new Batman. Or maybe Robin. It has obvious elements of Knightfall (Bane breaking Batman’s back) and No Man’s Land (Gotham is separated from the rest of the United States), but also some nods to Kingdom Come (Bruce’s body being in horrible shape after years of crime fighting, and the line “So that’s what that feels like”). We good? We good.

The Dark Knight (2008)

IMDB has The Dark Knight as the #4 top rated movie on their list of… well, if we’re talking about #4, how long the rest of the list goes doesn’t really matter. This movie made a huge impact when it first came out, but does it hold up a decade later? Yes! Of course it does! This movie is amazing!

Batman Begins (2005)

We started with cartoons, continued with a mix between gothic and campy, and now we have reached the Nolan trilogy. These are some of the most successful Batman movies out there, delivering apparently what people expect of the caped crusader. I’ll touch more on that another day, but for now, we begin with Batman Begins.