When a friend told me about Triggered, I was confused why she was drawing my attention to a film about kids in the woods with bombs around their necks. But that's 2020's Triggered; 2019's Triggered is about a social justice warrior murdering people. That made a bit more sense given my tendency to watch the worst movies. But maybe this was a parody made in good faith? Maybe the message isn't just, "she's a deranged person who's doing all this for attention." But then I saw it, and unfortunately that's absolutely the message. Well fuck me, I guess.
I like describing this movie to people. I tell them about the time-travelling bear that was abducted by aliens, the Freaky Friday switch that also goes across time, a masked serial killer inspired by a lame movie starring “Moscow Hyatt,” a jock infused with fly blood, subdued Dane Cook… “Isn’t there detention in a movie called Detention?” Yeah yeah, I was getting to that.