Sometimes one particular moment stands out in a movie and that's all you remember. When I think the movie Plankton, it takes me a moment to remember the "plot" as I'm immediately focusing on the scene where one girl has caviar oozing out of her vagina as she shouts to the eggs that Mommy loves them. This is also the case with Remember Me, a movie starring Mr. Robert Pattinson that came out in the middle of the Twilight franchise. Before I watched this movie for the third time for this post, I couldn't remember any plot details other than the twist ending where Pattinson dies in the Twin Towers on 9/11.
all cops are bastards
Swamp Shark (2011)
My celebration of Shark Week continues, now officially one month late as of today! I'm continuing on partly because this was all planned ahead of time and partially out of spite. Going by the listing on the back of the "Shark Bait: 6 Killer shark Films" DVD case I've been pulling movies from, today would be Santa Jaws, but I'm saving that one for Christmas. The gay kid from Joe Bell manifesting a Santa hat wearing nightmare shark? Sounds hilarious! But that means today I'm stuck watching Swamp Shark. It's not the worst shark movie I've seen, but it's far from the best. It's the only film in this pack that's available on Tubi, so that says something.
Fear Street: 1666 (2021)
I did it! I actually took the time to reread The Fear Street Saga books! And it's a good thing I did, because the parallels between that trilogy of books and this trilogy of movies are... uh... Okay, so there's next to no connection and I can't get too excited about reading a novella written for teenagers, but still. Back to the topic on hand, Fear Street: 1666 ties all the threads from Fear Street: 1994 and Fear Street: 1978 together, revealing the truth behind all the bad things that happen in Shadyside. And I'm going to talk around that as this is a mostly spoiler free review. Yup, being super inconsistent about that with this trilogy.
Free Fall (2013)
Who has two thumbs and survived the worst heatwave to hit the Pacific Northwest in recorded history? This guy! Anyway, Pride Month is almost over and there was one last thing I wanted to do in honor of it: watch Freier Fall, AKA Free Fall. It's a German film from 2013 about two men who fall in love, but society is against them. Sound familiar and a little... overplayed? Sure does to me!
Wer (2013)
Don't you hate it when a movie gets spoiled by its trailer? I can't even begin to count the number of films where I watched the trailer and thought, "Well that's got to be 90% of the plot." Which brings me to Wer, a movie that makes you wonder whether the antagonist is actually supernatural or not, while the trailer flat out says, yeah, he's a werewolf.
Cube (1997)
What time is it? Looks like it’s time for a mini-event! I want to cover some trilogies (and a tetralogy or two) so expect bonus posts on Thursdays for a few weeks. And we’re starting with a series near and dear to my heart: Cube! And my “near and dear to my heart,” I mean that I saw the first one something like 20 years ago, vaguely remembered the ending, and never saw the other two. Look, I got a notification that Tubi was removing all three films by the end of July, so that lit a fire under my ass, and here we are.
Chwineka Watches 