Tag: family matters
“I don’t have friends, I got family.”
-Furious 7 (2015)
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Longlegs (2024)
I was planning to cover something political and trashy in the wake of… you know, but that didn’t manifest in time. But you know what I did watch last week? Longlegs, the new horror film from Mr. Osgood Perkins–son of Mr. Anthony Perkins of Psycho fame–and Mr. Nic Cage. And it was pretty good! So let’s talk about that and ignore our impending doom. Doom, doom, dooooooom…
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Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)
Last we saw the Paranormal Activity franchise as part of Paranormal Octoberty, Toby/Tobi was granted a physical body and I guess the apocalypse happened, or something. Not very easy to continue that story, so 6 years later we have a reboot! Or an attempt at an anthology that’s somewhat related to the previous films while not actually continuing the story? How very Halloween III: Season of the Witch of you, and I don’t mean that as a compliment. Was it worth it? I mean… not especially, but was it better than Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension? Read on to find…
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The Exorcist: Believer (2023)
It is absolutely wild to me that an Exorcist sequel came out in the year of our Lord 2023. I know I haven’t always been the most up to date on movies, but I had no idea this movie existed until I went looking for a companion franchise for the Paranormal Activity films as part of Paranormal Octoberty. And while Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin–which came out in 2021 and I only learned about it like two years later–is supposed to be a stand-alone film, The Exorcist: Believer wants us to know that they got Ms. Ellen Burstyn. She was…
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Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension (2015)
I can’t really call it a “milestone,” but Paranormal Octoberty has reached the point where this is the last movie in either franchise–Paranormal Activity and The Exorcist–that I have seen. And I basically remembered nothing about Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension, so it’s kind of like watching it again for the first time? And now that I’m blogging about it, I’m sure that it’ll stick in my brain. Yup, I definitely remember watching every movie I’ve talked about on here! Like that Jensen Ackles movie, Devour, where he… uh… was in a dysfunctional relationship with Jared Padalecki from Gilmore Girls?…
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Paranormal Activity 4 (2012)
We’re starting to push against the limits of the Paranormal Activity franchise, which I’ve been talking about this month as part of Paranormal Octoberty, insert shameless plug here. The first Paranormal Activity was about Katie, 2 was about the her sister Kristi, and 3 was about the two of them as children. All dealing with an invisible demon, yes yes yes, but we’ve focused on the same family for three films now. So it makes sense to jump ahead in the timeline and focus on another family! It’d also make sense if this was the end of the franchise, but…
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Paranormal Activity 3 (2011)
So… Paranormal Activity 3 is the one of the better horror “threequels,” right? I mean, honestly, what else is in the running? Ignoring obvious losers like Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth and Children of the Corn III: Urban Harvest we have a couple worth mentioning in this intro paragraph: The Exorcist III is pretty decent (but we’ll get to that later in Paranormal Octoberty), I’m not sure if Day of the Dead counts because it doesn’t have a “3” in the title but it was also pretty good, Friday the 13th Part III is only really noteworthy because that’s when…
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Paranormal Activity 2 (2010)
Look, I’m not going to say that Paranormal Activity 2 is a bad movie. It’s fine, 5 out of 10. I just think it’s the start of a slippery slope for the franchise. The first Paranormal Activity–which I covered last week as part of Paranormal Octoberty, hi, gotta throw a plug for the event into every intro paragraph, yes–was a decent stand-alone horror film with hints at something larger. But 2 really starts to dive deep into the lore of Katie and her family, and it’s not always great. I mean, we’re not at time traveling witches yet, but I…
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The Exorcist (1973)
I really hope you didn’t believe that I didn’t have a plan to fill out the 6 Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays left over after covering the 7 Paranormal Activity movies… The Exorcist and it’s 5(ish) sequels fit right into Paranormal Octoberty! Both franchises are about demons preying on humanity, but take different journeys on how that manifests. Plus it gives me a chance to review both a horror classic–this one–and also what a number of people argue is one of the worst horror movies ever made–Exorcist II: The Heretic. Is that really how I’m going to honor the recent death…
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X-Men ’97 – Season 1, Episode 10
Previously, on X-Men! How have I seriously done the entirety of X-Men ’97’s first season and never once made that joke? I’m slipping, y’all… Anyway, Magneto has doomed the Earth in retaliation for Genosha! An attempt to force him to undo his damage led to Wolverine having the adamantium ripped out of his body! Meanwhile, Bastion and Mister Sinister are a deadly duo the X-Men can’t seem to beat! Is this the end of the X-Men? No. What? Of course not. Why would you…? Anyway, let’s wrap up “Tolerance is Extinction” and the show’s first season. It’s a doozy.
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X-Men ’97 – Season 1, Episode 8
We’re in the final stretch now. Episodes 8 through 10 of X-Men ’97 are called “Tolerance is Extinction” parts one through three, a big and elaborate season finale. Will the X-Men triumph against Bastion and Mister Sinister? Possibly! Are there more surprises waiting for viewers? Yes. Oh my yes. And hey! Professor X is back in the opening credits! I bet he’ll show up at some point!
Chwineka Watches 