Tag: martial arts
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A Karate Christmas Miracle (2019)
Man, I have been watching some absolute garbage movies lately. Under ConTroll tried way too hard for such a lackluster “sequel,” the Blood Freak remake was cheap on every level, and Joker’s Poltergeist took the real life tragedy of the Aurora theater shooting and turned it into a lame horror movie. In fact, A Karate Christmas Miracle is from the same wrier as Joker’s Poltergeist and reused footage from that horror flick. While I knew this would be yet another bad film, I at least assumed it’d be more coherent than Poltergeist. Oh, how wrong I was.
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Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)
A lot of people were prepared for Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings to underperform. Beyond the chuds who predict any film not starring a white male will fail, we’re still in the middle of a pandemic and theaters–enclosed spaces where you and up to a hundred strangers sit for hours, sharing the same air–aren’t as popular as they used to be. But the naysayers can suck it! In addition to having a pretty good opening overall, Shang-Chi is now the highest grossing Labor Day opening weekend box office, earning over triple the previous top film, 2007’s Halloween.…
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The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
I would like to start this post with a bit of a public service announcement: The Matrix Revolutions is the third film in The Matrix trilogy. I know this may be pretty obvious to some, but I hadn’t watched these films in nearly two decades, and since Revolutions and The Matrix Reloaded both came out in 2003–albeit 6 months apart–I was confused as to which one came first. So if you’re finding this post and haven’t read the one on Reloaded, there’s nothing I can do to force you to go back, but I do build off stuff I talked…
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The Matrix Reloaded (2003)
I honestly considered not reviewing The Matrix sequels during Pride Month. The original film is now widely accepted as a trans allegory–no doubt helped by the creators, Lana and Lilly Wachowski, coming out as trans women in the years since. But my goal was to at least try to watch them with a queer eye, so Pride Month is as good a time as any. Did I find overt queerness in The Matrix Reloaded? Well… not really. Drat.
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The Matrix (1999)
As I said in the Strapped post, one of my goals for Pride Month was to review The Matrix trilogy. Sure, it’s about a white cisgender guy who falls in love with a white cisgender girl, but the creators are trans women! Well, they are now; Mrs. Lana and Lily Wachowski didn’t write and direct The Matrix under those names, but we try not to deadname here, especially during Pride Month. So get ready for a week of trans philosophy! Or really one day of trans philosophy and two of “I think the overall message got a bit muddied as…
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Mortal Kombat (2021)
I must’ve played a Mortal Kombat game at some point, right? I know I’ve played Street Fight and I was of course at least somewhat aware of the ongoing Mortal Kombat story/franchise, but I couldn’t really tell you much. Scorpion and Sub-Zero wear the same outfits, Kano pees too much, and Mr. James Remar was Lord Raiden in Mortal Kombat: Annihilation. I don’t have anything against the franchise, but I just absolutely suck at fighting games. My husband–a professional gamer compared to me–is a fan, so he was more excited to watch the new Mortal Kombat than I was, but…
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Prey of the Jaguar (1997)
I love discount DVDs. Two movies you’ve never heard of for a dollar? Sign me up! I don’t even care that they’re usually pretty awful. Are you really going to regret a movie where you only spent 50 cents? I mean, generally I’d say no, but I’m not the one in my friend group who […]
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