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Diary of a Cannibal (2007)
FuuuUUUuuuUUUuuuUUUck this movie! Fuck it straight to hell! I hate it, I hate everyone who worked on it, I hate that it’s not the only Ulli Lommel movie I’ve seen, and I just hate every single aspect of it!
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Blood Freak (1972)
Many years ago, when I was a child-shaped entity, my father had a big book of movie reviews. Pretty sure it was VideoHound’s Golden Movie Retriever, or whatever it might have been called back then. Anyway, the book rated movies on a 0 to 4 scale with “bones” instead of “stars” and a noticeable “Woof!” for movies that got a 0. Being weird, I had looked up all the movies that started with the word “Blood,” and this woof of a review stood out. After reading the summary, I made it my goal in life to see this awful film.…
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Frankenstein vs. the Mummy (2015)
Mummy Mondays are on pause for at least a week due to coronavirus quarantine (we are in the darkest timeline), but to keep the mood alive I’m going to be watching The Mummy adjacent movies! This week it’s Frankenstein vs. the Mummy, a film that was way too long for what it was.
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Mid-March Madness Update
Hey gang! Chwineka here, and we are about halfway through March Madness! I haven’t missed a weekday update yet, and on just about any other month I could probably keep this up pretty consistently! But March isn’t just “any other month.” Oh no.
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The Heretics (2017)
Is it really so hard to do the barest minimum of research, filmmakers? I get that a good number of you are godless heathens (no judgment from me), but if you’re going to reference The Bible, is it so hard to open the book to the table of contents and see that it’s ACTUALLY The Book of Revelation, NOT Revelations? Singular, not plural? I know it’s a real petty point, especially one to start on, but whenever I see a demon hunter or a cult leader make such an easy mistake, it sort of takes me out of the moment.
Chwineka Watches
The dead speak!
Chwineka Watches 